This Japanese House: The Kitchen

It's about damn time, yo. I'm closing in on two years here and I finally, FINALLY have the kitchen to a point that it doesn't make me break down into a sobbing wreck.

Okay, I'm exaggerating slightly. But it did give me all the sads for a long time. Then I thought get over your badself because fuck it, this is Japan. This is a rental house in Japan. This is a far cry from my white marble dream kitchen that, let's face it, isn't ever going to happen for most of us way down here in the 99%.

Time to give THIS kitchen some love! With all its imperfections. No more drippy in-depth complaining about how I don't have an oven, garbage disposal, or dishwasher, or about the ugly faucet, or the harsh overhead fluorescent light I never ever turn on, or about the redundant, awkward sliding door to the bathroom right next to the refrigerator, or that the 5'10" back door is sized for midgets Japanese people and we couldn't figure out how to open it for three months, or the confusing little fish broiler drawer beneath the stovetop in which I always burn toast, or the beige fake marble plastic wall panels, or the counters that are almost 4" shorter than standard western counter height, or the totally wack storage space ... in the floor.

Nope. Not talking about those things beyond listing them just now. Check. I also won't start in on the pathetic longing for my other kitchens, 1 & 2.

Instead I'll point out the very affordable cute little white perfectly-sized fridge from Muji.

And the über cool black hood ...

... over the adorable yet hardworking 3-burner gas stovetop.

And the amazingly low-maintenance stainless steel countertop that I LOVE.

Hey-o, check out my fancy Sori Yanagi kettle I picked up for half the price I'd pay outside of Japan.

Oh how I prefer kitchen drawers over cabinets. See how I covered those drawers with removable chalkboard wallpaper because they're pink.

Here are the shelves I built for about $40 and mounted on the sliding doorframe to the bathroom. (there's a normal door to the bathroom from the hallway, too)

Oh yeah, and not to mention just the whole charming wabi-sabi Japanness of it all. Gotta say I'm pret-ty stoked I'm not too mortified to post photos of this kitchen out on the scary Internets. Trying to keep it real by focusing on and appreciating what's good and accepting what I cannot change. Just like that dumb quote tells us – you know, the one hipsters tattoo on their midriffs.

So what do you think? Does my bizarro kitchen or house change any perceptions you may have had about living in Japan? (see more house here, here & here)

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Screw Household Convenience, This is Japan

Here is the entirety of my Japanese kitchen except for the refrigerator. See if you can spot the dishwasher. Oh, you can't because there isn't one.

I live in Japan without the following items: dishwasher, garbage disposal, clothes dryer, oven, insulated walls, central heating, fenced yard, outdoor seating or privacy, and garage. No, I didn't become a Buddhist nun and move to a monastery deep in a bamboo forest, this is just how everyday Japanese people live.

Wait. Japan?? ... Land of fancy cameras, hi-tech gadgets, video games, stereo equipment, televisions, Hello Kitty, and ubiquitous hybrid cars?

Yes. Japan.

Right? Imagine my surprise. Let's start with dishwashers. Except for camping trips, the last time I had no dishwasher was in college when I lived in a cute little converted 1-car garage in Boulder. WTF, Japaaann.

Here are some reasons I've come up with for this gaping hole in daily household life:

The gender problem. Like many other shall we disrespectfully call them less enlightened societies, home care in Japan is built into the duties of women. Traditionally their role is to accept these duties quietly and willingly, which they have historically done. Think 1950s America. Until the last few decades, Japanese women have been given few equal opportunities in the career world. It's still generally accepted that most women will stay in the home and work their asses off there all day, primarily because they lack first world modern conveniences. I call it oppressive but then I'm just an insensitive, lazy westerner.

Lack of space. Lots of city-dwellers in the western world live in cramped spaces and wash dishes by hand too, female or not. In cities it's about lack of space in Japan too, many Japanese apartments don't have kitchens at all, let alone space for anything more than 2 burners and a mini refrigerator. But I live in a house, surrounded by average homes that are in fact big, even by US standards (like 2,000 square feet) so the lack-of-space excuse doesn't fly. Also, when I lived in a small city apartment in Europe we had a smaller kitchen than we do in Japan yet it included an 18" dishwasher. So it's not really about lack of space.

The trade philosophy. I suspect it's also about Japanese isolationism and the government's long-term unwillingness to trade with the rest of the world. Well, they definitely trade OUT (PlayStation anyone? Toyota? Canon?) yet they bring IN very little, theoretically to keep their economy going (until now, that is) by selling few goods domestically that are not Japanese. And they basically don't make dishwashers, or import them. (Samsung and LG are Korean brands, the lucky bastards!) At the Ikea here in Japan I did notice dishwashers on their show floor are all made by the Swedish company Electrolux, and were not available for sale.  In fact, Japan does not allow Ikea to sell any appliances.

A few countertop dishwashers are made here – you know, the kind that hook up to the sink. This Panasonic looks like spawn of a toaster oven and bread maker. It also looks cheap and gadgety and probably doesn't work well if it's anything like my washing machine, which doesn't actually clean unless you run it for two or three cycles. And where does this beast go when it's not in use? Are you supposed to leave it out, taking up precious counter space? Yeah. NO.

Kitchen design. I know we all like to think that everyone in Japan lives in modern minimalistic design heaven, but that simply isn't the case for I'd say about 95% of the population. Japanese houses are built quickly out of cheap materials and are not meant to last. Homes are extremely utilitarian, and they're pretty much all the same inside. The Acme grade kitchen unit (like mine, pictured up above) is one big piece and exists almost identically in most homes.

Obedience. Japanese people don't complain and they're surprisingly nationalistic and trust their big companies and government to keep the country happy. It has served them well and really, why have a dishwasher when you've never needed one before? Fuck innovation and convenience. This is Japan.

I'm clearly still working on acceptance here. To embrace my new role as top dish dog, quite the dubious honor, I have tips for life without a mechanized dishwasher:

+ one pot cooking
+ make lots of sandwiches
+ get take out and dine out often
+ snacks (but avoid too many Funyuns)
+ daytime water glass = evening wine glass
+ never thought I'd say this but use paper plates and eat off paper towels whenever possible
+ wash and dry immediately and put everything away to avoid depression, bugs, and counter-surfing boxer dogs
+ try to remember to use rubber gloves (I almost never do)
+ if you have more than one person in your household, switch daily between washing and drying
+ to avoid further depression and feeling as if feminism was just a figment of your imagination, use good dish soap you really like – believe it or not I actually order Mrs. Meyers through iHerb (they have all kinds of great stuff and ship to Japan for only $4)
+ ditto for dish towels – when I'm stateside I nab plain white flour sack towels at Target 

Desperate times, yo! Okaaay, more like first world problems, Japan-style.

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Sadass to Badass: Studio Kitchen Overhaul

I've been meaning to post this kitchen renovation forfuckingever. Yeah, I'm all slo-mo about blogging. So this is my little studio in Vail I renovated last year. Did almost all of the work myself because my thug spouse was working overseas and I'm a batshit crazy determined bitch.

Wouldn't it be funny if these were the 'after' shots? So funny.

Hell yes that is one fly kitchen. I sort of hate posting these photos because they scare me a little. The realtor used these to advertise the property and nothing about that makes sense to me. And they just don't go with my whole punk blog aesthetic. Forrealz.

 Your observations are spot on. The previous owner was indeed a cat lady.

Things began to calm down, thank fuck.

But then it got worse. Like there were at least five hundred grimy cat toys under the stove.

Hot damn, those fleshtone cabinet interiors.

Amazing what appliances, paint, and decent lighting do. I bet you're thinking all that shit on the counter is maybe not so good. Oh, is that boxed wine next to the hand saw? But I get so much more done when I drink. You think I'm kidding.

Wood floors help too. Actually it's engineered wood. Which is cheaper and therefore boss.

And now begin the sparkly-shiny 'after' shots. Read on for the all the fascinating minutiae of this small but magical kitchen transformation.

KitchenAid stove, hood and dishwasher, a bitchin little 13 cubic ft Fisher & Paykel fridge, and small undercounter Panasonic microwave that I built in all by myself. I searched for weeks for the right size stove, if its depth were 1/2 of a centimeter more the dishwasher wouldn't open. Good times in small spaces yo.

I painted all the things. Because I'm a punkrock painter. However, I painted the cabinets 3 times before deciding on colors. Sometimes I hate myself. My go-to colors (black, white, grey) were not working with the counters so I went with something that would. I mean, as far as anything can work with the color of a loogie. Fuck if I can't remember the paint colors I used right now but it's Benjamin Moore Aura satin. Bomber paint.

 

I agonized over ripping down the upper cabinets and installing new ones or open shelves. In the end I ran out of time and money. Same reason the lame formica counters are still there. That always happens. One day they will be so not there.

The devil really is in the details. The LED fixtures, shelf, and most accessories are from Ikea. Newgate clock from Horne. Budget Pfister faucet from Lowe's.

Russell Hobbs coffee maker and there's a chrome Dualit toaster but you can't really see it. I wasn't being as thorough as I should have (what?) because I took these photos at midnight just before driving 14 hours to catch a plane from California to Japan. That's just how I roll.

Approximate cost breakdown: Large appliances $4250 (got the $2800 stove for $900 because it has a small ding on the underside of the handle), small appliances $250, faucet $50, electrical and plumbing labor (not mine) $200, paint $100, accessories $150, light fixtures $100, random shit $50, already had flatware, dishes, clock, toaster and most everything else. So that's just over $5k not including flooring.

Someday I'll do a full redesign the way I want it with open shelves, tile, new cabinets and dope countertops. But for now this is all kinds of awesome (people tell me) and it's full on ready for your next mountain weekend escape so please rent it and make your friends rent it.

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UPDATE: Fuck yeah professional photos!